the change for better or worst

2 yrs has passed since i made the decision at the new crossroad.

now i'm making a u-turn to go back to the crossroad. this path i would not say its wrong. its just unusual.

it changed my life lots, in terms of health, thinking, and becoming not me.

working in this company has made myself not being myself. I was not able to demonstrate the real me.

i have migraines, pain on the right leg and even menstrual issues.

it looks like i have to do something now to stop anything else to deteriorate further.

i'm still waiting ... with the hope that it will come soon before i go off for my holidays and i can kill off some of the days without needing to go to work.

at this moment, anything that can help to minimise the number of days i need to go to work would be BEST.

i pray to god everyday to bless me. hopefully everything will be smooth sailing

2 yrs indeed another lesson.

1 yr living in remorse mourning over something that happened in the past 2 yrs followed by a year living hopeless, depressed.

and with no direction. i was able to wake up from that dream- thanks to someone. who is also the person whom i figure out i can no longer continue to work with him.

i do not want to continue my life which is waking up at 6.30am, jam all the way to work, eating breakfast in office, work and wait for lunchtime, lunch and then finally wait for knocking off work and beating the jam to reach home for dinner!

this cycle evolves everyday for the past 6 months at least! i abhor this kind of lifestyle. i hate that i have to sleep by 10pm or at most 10.30pm so that i wont fall asleep in office the next day.

i pray hard all this will end soon and i can revert back to the lifestyle that i prefer.